Fifteen years ago, the NBA created the experiment known as the WNBA. Despite the continual advertisements, the inane 'We Got Next' promotions, and David Stern trying to ram it down our collective throats, no one cared. Fast forward fifteen years, and still, no one cares. In fact, the WNBA rates behind women's college basketball in terms of popularity.
Women's professional sports league, as a whole, do not do well in America. Does anyone remember the Women's United Soccer Association? This league came into existence based off of the popularity of women's soccer after the 1999 FIFA Women's World Cup. Of course, most of that popularity was probably a direct result of Brandi Chastain removing her shirt after celebrating a goal, but the league founders did not realize that. Predictably, the WUSA folded after three years.
Despite the David Stern and the NBA claiming that they are losing money, they continue to funnel cash into this league. NBA teams are forced to 'affiliate' with WNBA teams in their region, and to help support them. Meanwhile, since the league began fifteen years ago, six teams have folded. Three have relocated. And yet, the NBA continues to try to expand the league, increasing the number of financial sinkholes from eight to the present twelve. In fact, of the original eight teams, only four remain. Not exactly a statistic that screams that this is a viable league.
Yet, the league stumbles forward like some horror movie villain that refuses to die. Now in their fifteenth year of existence (or the equivalent of Friday the 13th part 15, with Jason Voorhees attempting to hypnotize the masses into watching the exercise in pure tedium that is being broadcast), the WNBA has announced plans to commemorate this milestone. The top fifteen players in WNBA history will be announced, as will the top fifteen moments in league history. Expect a lot of boredom in that 'highlight' reel. Chances are, the medical profession will be prescribing it as a cure for insomnia. Also, they are planning on holding speciality themed events (like playing the games), fan promotions, interactive events, and presentations to long time season ticket holders (all four of you) throughout the season.
Supporters of the WNBA will claim that this is basketball at it's purest, where fundamentals matter. They will claim that this is a league where being properly coached, having solid teamwork, and knowing your role on the team matter. What they fail to realize is that the games are as exciting as watching paint dry. As completely terrible and unwatchable as the games in the NBA presently are, at least there are moments of excitement. In the WNBA, the most exciting play is the properly executed bounce pass. These Clydesdales with a ball should be put to pasture.
So, be prepared for the onslaught of advertisements proclaiming this monumental occasion. The best way to prepare is make certain that the batteries in your remote control are fresh, otherwise you might accidentally have to endure parts of the game.
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