The Tour De Farce

With the coming of July, the attention of the sporting world turns ever so slightly toward an event so dirty that even a Kardashian sister thinks that it has an image problem - the Tour de France. In this farce of an event, 'clean' cyclists race across France, striving for the ever elusive Yellow Jersey of Leadership and ultimate victory.

This grand event of cycling prowess has lost a lot of it's luster over the past few years. Since Lance Armstrong and his one testicle ripped off seven consecutive victories, allegations of doping have circled the race like so many vultures over a dying animal. In fact, it has gotten to the point where claiming that someone on the Tour de France is using PEDs is not even news. If someone is actually running that race clean, they are at a major competitive disadvantage. Even though they do occasionally catch someone doping, it seems that is more likely to have happened because they actually tested that one person's blood during the event. They can't test them all and have everyone come back dirty - after all, they have a race to run and corporate sponsorship money to receive.

As it stands, the Tour and professional cycling may as well come clean about the entire situation and be a lot more transparent. Sell the naming rights to the event to BALCO. Bring in Victor Conte and Greg Anderson as experts, giving tips on the best way to use PEDs for maximum effect. Have disgraced former winner Floyd Landis as a commentator, detailing each cyclists doping regiment. In fact, you can even bring Charlie Sheen in as a celebrity guest. He used steroids when filming Major League, so he knows all about PEDs. Plus, there would be the unintentional comedy of watching him try to ride a bike.

The Tour de France is nothing more than a farce. It's time they admit it.